Love Finds a Way
by katniss-everdeen-victor
Summary: Peeta leaves for a meeting and theres a crash everyone thinks he dies until one day Katniss finds him he doesnt remember her or anything. He doesnt even remember or know of his love for her. Will she find a way to get him to believe her and love her again?
1. prologue

We sit around the fire I am wearing a soft orange dress I wore in district 11 and Peeta is wearing a nice dress shirt and pants. I stick my bread into the fire first and toast it.

"Peeta I love you and I may have not realized that the moment I saw you but I do now and I will never forget it" I say taking out my peice of bread. I was smiling brightly being only 18 and marrying the man I loved was a dream come true. He sticks his peice into the fire and smiles brightly a smile i have never seen till now.

"Katniss I love u too I have since I first laid eyes on you and I swear I will die before I stop loving you" He says smiling and pulls me close to him. He takes his peice out of the fire and holds it up to my mouth. I hold my peice up to his mouth and take a bite of it. It tastes like burnt peices of bread mixed with perfectly toasted peices thats why we hold the toasting in district 12 the burnt peices represent the bad times in a marriage and the perfectly toasted parts the good times. Peeta smiles at me and grabs my hand he pulls me out into the middle of the living room and holds me close and we start dancing. Everyone in the room smiling at us. we decided to keep the wedding small only my mom, haymitch, gale, hazelle and delly were there. After the wedding me and peeta walk upstairs after saying goodbye to everyone we crawl into bed and later I whisper in his ear

"stay with me"

"always" he replies smiling down and kissing me

authors note:

hey guys! this is my first fan fic and i know my prologue is short but i promise it will get longer! so plz stick with it and it will get better and also my spelling and my grammer sucks so plz dont put negitive reveiws about that. ALSO PROGRESSIVE CRITISM IS ALLOWED! so tell me hope you like it and review! review! review!


	2. Chapter 1

Disclaimer:i do not own any of the hunger games

'always' i think he promised he would always be here he would never leave but he did the hovercraft crash that toke his life fell out of the sky without warning and they never found his body. So here I am at Peeta's memorial service and funeral trying to figure out how im gonna last the rest of my life without him. How im gonna let my kids know they wont see their father ever again. Hazelle, Haymitch, Gale and everyone else they keep telling me everything is gonna be ok but how is everything gonna be ok when i lost the man i love and my kids lost their dad. how is that ok? Then my daughter lily came up to me intrupting my thoughts.  
"mommy" she said pulling on my pant leg holding Jayden's hand "we want to know where daddy went and when hes coming back" she looked up at me with those bright blue eyes that were Peeta's. I sigh and kneel beside them and hold them close trying to think of what im gonna to tell them i finally let them go and look at them.

"lily, Jayden I dont know when daddy will be back" I tell them but they look at me not believing me  
"mommy daddy said he would be back soon he even told me when he would be back" lily said looking straight at me "he said he would be back seven sleeps ago" she said sadly "does daddy not love us anymore is that why he left and hes not coming back" she looks at me sadness i thought i would never see in those eyes and i quickly pull them into a hug.

"no dont think that daddy loved you both very much and he just got into some trouble and wont be home for a very long time" i tell them quickly and they both nod their heads and follow me to our seats. The service starts and i fight back the tears as long as i can and when i cant stand it any longer i rush out of the service leaving my kids at their seats, confused on why i ran out on them they both run after me.

"mommy!" they cry and run up to me "whats wrong mommy why did you run away" they ask worried about me and unable to hold my tears back any longer i start to cry. I look at them their faces confused and concerened about why im suddenly crying but how can i tell them that their dad is dead. I cant tell them that not after I have given them hope hes still alive and might come back.  
"nothings wrong" i say wiping away my tears "i just miss daddy like you guys do im ok" they both look at me not believing me.  
"mommy is everything really ok?" Jayden asks me i nod slowly

"yes everything is fine Jayden do you guys want to go back inside or go back home?" i ask them trying to get off the subject of me being fine or not because i hate lying to my kids and i already told them peeta is coming back. Which is a big lie but how can you tell a 4 and a 6 year old there dad is dead? you just cant do it its hard to do it and i cant do it to them i just cant see how sad they will look when they find out their dads not coming back. then im brought back to reality lily is tugging at my arm.  
"mommy?" she said a little worried "what were u doing u werent answering me or Jayden for a long time" she look at me confused i nod my head.

"im fine sorry i was thinking so what did u guys want to do?" i ask them again  
"we want to go back inside!" Jayden said jumping up and down i sigh and nod my head.  
"ok come on then" i say taking both their hands and walking back into the funeral home. The funeral finally ended with minimal tears from me. I hate having my kids worry about me if im gonna be ok or if i am ok. Because of course the answer is always gonna be 'im fine' or 'im ok'. the only person i ever told my feelings too was peeta and now that hes gone i cant tell anyone so i am keeping them bottled up inside. i walk my kids home and i tuck them into bed i then crawl into my bed which is cold and lonely since peeta left and died. i fall asleep and have the same nightmares i do every night since peeta died.

when i wake up if i get any sleep at all i will usually go downstairs and if the kids are still sleeping go for a short walk outside or if they are up then i will start getting breakfast ready for them and then take lily and jayden to school. Most days when peeta was still alive i would take of into the forest or sometimes spend the day with him at the bakery now i spend most days at the bakery after peeta died i had to take over as manager for it. I miss my days in the forest, but I guess its for the better. With Peeta gone I've had to do so much more around the house, and the bakery. Lily and Jayden keep asking when their father is coming back, every time I say 'not for a long time' because what else do u say to a 4 and 6 year old u cant say hes never coming back that will only out questions in there mind like 'why' and 'does he want to come home' and i just dont have answers for those questions. early the next morning im sitting at the table i have already come back from my walk and its to early to start breakfast then i hear a knock on my door. i stand up and slowly make my way to the door i open it and theres my mentor haymitch standing there.  
"haymitch!?" i almost yell he quickly cover my mouth.

"would u shut up already!" he hisses at me "i need to talk to u and i dont think u have told the kids yet so unless u suddenly feel ready to tell them be quiet" he says and i nod moving his hand from my mouth.  
"what do we need to talk about haymitch" i ask letting him in and sitting on the couch he sighs and looks at me  
"sweetheart we need to talk about u ur not urself anymore ur lost without peeta and telling the kids hes coming back ur basically telling urself hes still alive" he sighs i shake my head.  
"haymitch im fine ill be ok eventually its only been a couple of weeks haymitch give me some time to realize hes not coming back" i say softly he looks toward me.

"katniss stop telling urself hes alive when u know hes dead once u believe peetas dead the better off ull be!" he tells me standing up and walking out and thats when i hear the word i didnt want to hear after this.  
"mommy...? is daddy really dead" lily askes me tears already falling down her cheeks.


	3. Chapter 2

i turn around to look at my daughter.

"lily im sorry i didnt tell u" i say softly "come here" i tell her opening my arms for her. shes crying harder now and almost jumps into my arms.

"daddy's dead..." i hear her repeat maybe its to let it sink in her dads dead and shes never gonna see him again or its just to let herself know i lied to her about her dad being dead. i hold her tight and whisper in her ear softly.

"im sorry" i manage to say "im sorry i lied lily i just didnt know how to tell u and ur brother daddy's dead" i tell her tears falling down my face "i should have told u guys earlier im sorry" i mumble in her ear and all i hear in response is the sound of her crying and already tears are falling down my face. then i hear the soft footsteps of my son as he gets out of bed and slowly makes his way downstairs.

"mommy" he calls when he sees us crying "whats wrong with u and lily?" he askes sitting on my lap "why are you guys crying?" he look at me with the same grey eyes that are mine and i sigh.

"jayden" i say softly "im sorry i didn tell you this eariler but..." i close my eyes trying to figure out the right words to say "daddy's not coming back because daddy's dead" i immediatly see tears fill his eyes and my heart breaks "im sorry jayden im sorry lily i just didnt know how to tell you guys" i whisper holding them closer but i feel jayden push me away.

"no! mommy you could have told us sooner! i hate you mommy!" he screams and runs upstairs crying i look down at lily and shes holding me tightly.

"mommy its ok i love you hes mad he loved daddy he was really close with daddy he was gonna get daddy to teach him how to bake its not ur fault" i hear her telling me quietly but shes hurting too everytime she said 'daddy' she stuttered and almost burst into tears again.

She loved him too she loved him more then she would want anyone to think but i knew everytime he came home the look on her face was unmistakable she was happy to have her daddy home to play with. i sigh looking at her one conversation and i have broken both there hearts and who knows if i can do anything to heal them when i still have my own heart to mend. so all i do is hold her tight and hum their lullaby, the valley song, in her ear.

the next morning i wake up and head to the bathroom the dropets of blood i should normally see on my underwear isnt there. i bite my lip no this isnt happening i run the the store and quickly run back i take the test and in a few minutes i have my answer.

im pregnant.

I look at the test not believing what it says. 'im pregnant!' i scream in my mind i cant do this peeta is dead i cant be having childeren after hes gone i already have two now i have another one. i feel tears fill my eyes again i can barely mother the two childeren i already have how can i mother another one.

a child that will never met its father a child that peeta will never know or get the chance to love. tears fall down my cheeks i cant do it ive broken one can only be strong for so long one will eventually fall to peices and that time for me happened to be right now and i cant be there for my kids right now when they need me most if i cant even be there for myself. i look down at the stick again 'what am i gonna do?' is the only question in my mind.

i place my hands on my abdomon peeta would be so happy to hear im pregnant again but hes not here to even know im pregnant again. our third child! i almost cant believe it maybe this was the thing i needed to maybe start becoming independant from peeta. then i hear the footsteps of my son running down the stairs. i walk out of the bathroom just in time to have him latch onto my legs.

"im sorry mommy" i hear him mumbling into my legs i crouch down and give him a big hug.  
"its ok jayden" i whisper in his ear "you were upset and angry about daddy im not mad" i can feel him tighten his grip on me.

"but mommy i said bad things that i shouldnt have said" he cries into my shoulder and i just hold him tightly and hum in his ear until he calms down.

"all better?" i ask a while later pulling him slightly away from me and i see him wipe away his tears and nod.  
"im gonna miss daddy" he says softly i kiss him on the head.

"me too" i reply softly "im gonna miss daddy too" i hold him tightly while he cries and after he has cryed himself out i pull him off me and look at him.

"is your sister up yet?" i ask and before he can answer i hear her running down the stairs and she almost tackles me.  
"is everything ok with u and jayden mommy?" she askes and i nod smiling a little.

"yes everything is all better" i tell her and look at them they still seem sad and i crouch down in front of them "hey i have an idea why dont u guys come down to the bakery with me today?" i ask them i see a smile appear on both there faces and they nod happily. they rarely get to go and when they do its a treat for them and after what they just found out i think they need it. i smile and stand up.

"alright then i will start on breakfast u guys get dressed and after breaskfast we will go ok?" i tell them and before i finish my scentance they are already running up the stairs. i smile and walk to the kitchen 'at least i have done something right' i think i start making some breakfast of bacon and eggs. when lily and jayden come down the stairs lily is wearing one of her soft orange sun dresses that brings out her dark brown hair ,similar to mine, she got when she was in district 2 with peeta. i smile and walk over to her.

"you look beautiful sweetie" i tell her kissing the top of her head and i turn to jayden whos wearing a camoflauge T-shirt and regular blue jeans. i smile and pick him up.

"look at my handsome boy here" i say tickling him and his laughter echos through the house. i smile and put him down.  
"come on lets eat and get going" i tell them putting some food on three plates and setting one in front of lily and one in front of jayden. i sit down beside jayden and eat my breakfast. after we all finished we got our shoes on and i grab each on my kids hands and together we set off towards the bakery.

**hey guys! please comment on how you like it so far! i am loving how many people have read it! as i said before this is my first fan fic...EVER so plx dont judge me to harshly i am trying im just not very good at english but im trying i swear! so reveiw if you like it thanks! and adios till chapter 4!**


	4. Chapter 3

we arrive at the bakery and vick has taken over since peeta died baking and everything because i am just hopeless at it. so i just deal with everything else bills and inventory. i go on business trips to other districts every once in a while but i secertly hate them im away from my kids. im the only parent they have left now and secertly im scared to go on these trips thats how peeta died travling between districts. if i suffer the same fate as peeta what will happen to our kids. they are way to young to lose both parents so i try to avoid district travel as much as possible. we walk to the back and see vick.

"morning vick" i smile faintly he looks at me and smiles.

"hey katniss how are you and the kids?" he asks pulling me into a hug i hug him back and shrug  
"been better i guess and thanks to haymitch i had to tell the kids the truth about peeta" i say sadly "it broke both their hearts" i sigh. vick looks at me sad.

"oh im so sorry katniss" he says "lily and jayden deserved to know though maybe haymitch was doing you a favor?" he says and for a reason out of no where i start crying 'crap' i think 'i forgot i was pregnant...' and before i know it vick is hugging me.

"its ok katniss" he says soothingly "everything will turn out ok i promise" he smiles i nod slowly  
"thanks vick" i force a smile "im gonna go to the back and work on bills and that can you keep an eye on the kids for me?" i ask and he nods.

"of course i can katniss" he says and turns to the kids as i walk into the office. i look at all the paperwork i have to do and sigh.

"just great" i mutter and sit down and start working at it. i hear the bell ring to announce someone entered the store. then i hear muttering and vick saying 'shes in the back' and i start to think who could that be who wants to see me and before i know it i see my mentor haymitch standing there looking at me the positive pregnancy test in his hand. i slap myself stupid me! i left it on the kitchen table where anyone who entered my house could easily find it.

"sweetheart why didnt you tell me?" he asks and i sigh.

"cause i was gonna try and hide it figure out what i was gonna do before i told anyone just please promise me you wont tell anyone" i almost beg and he just smiles.

"alright sweetheart just come to me sooner next time alright" he says and puts the test on the desk in front of me "and if you didnt want anyone to know u shouldnt have left it laying around" i just stare at it and nod.

"i know haymitch but what am i gonna do im gonna be the single mother of 3 i can barely keep 2 now a third i just cant do it..." i say buring my face in my hands and suddenly i feel haymitchs arms wrap around me.

"its alright sweetheart we will think of something" he tells me and i nod slowly as haymitch releases me.

"alright" i say "ok now i really need to get this done if you dont mind watching the kids so vick can work that would be great thanks" he smiles and kisses my cheek.

"sure sweetheart" he says and walks out to go entertain the kids.

i hear the muffled screams of delight coming from my childern. i smile slightly and contuine working when i hear a knock on the door i quickly hide the test in the top desk drawer.

"come in" i say and watch the door open slowly "oh hi vick what are you doing here shouldnt you be baking?" i ask and he nods quickly.

"i should but this came for you and it looked important so i came to drop it off" he hands me an envelope adressed to me and i smile slightly.

"thank you vick was this all" i ask looking at him and i see a smile creep up on his face.

"oh yah and congradulations kat hope it turns out like its brother and sister" and he quickly closes the door behind him. i just stare at him in disbelief and it suddenly comes to me 'haymitch told him!' i slam my fists on the desk 'im gonna kill him' i tell myself. i sigh and pick up the letter its addressed to me as manager of the bakery.

i quickly open it and stare at it saying there is a mandatory bakers meeting for all district bakery managers. i sigh that means i have to take a hovercraft or a train and i cant take either peeta died in a hovercraft crash and trains bring back to many memories of him.

it also means i will have to leave my kids for this meeting and its all weekend long i will have to leave in a week to get there its being held in district 6 and i am already dreading going there. i finally finish all the paperwork and look at the time 9:00!

the bakery closed hours ago why didnt anyone come get me! i stand up and quickly walk out lily and jayden need there supper and to be put to bed i run home and walk in.

"hey sweetheart id be quiet the kids are sleeping" i hear coming from the kitchen and walk into there and see haymitch sitting there. its all i can do not to blow up at him.

"you told me you wouldnt tell anyone! you told vick!" i try to stay quiet and he holds up his hands.

"calm down i didnt tell him he kinda figured it out when a full grown man walks into a bakery with a positive pregnancy test and asks to talk to you its kinda self explainatory" he says and i nod.

"i guess your right im sorry" i say and sit down at the table "i just got the worst news today"

"whats wrong" he asks looking at me "its not about the baby is it" and i instantly shake my head.

"no next week i have to go to a mandatory manager bakery meeting thing" i say looking down "and i dont want to go haymitch" he nods.

"i can tell sweetheart but you have to go if its mandatory" he tells me.

"well i know that im just terrifed to get on a hovercraft and i will have a mental breakdown if i get on a train" i look down and i feel something grab my hand its haymitch.

"i know sweetheart i know but its gonna be ok" he says "and i will watch the kids while your gone ok" i sigh and nod  
"thank you" i whisper.

**hey guys i love you all! that you so much for the people who have commented and followed it a dream for me i wasnt expecting many people to like it at all! i love you all and will hopefully update tomorrow! **


	5. Chapter 4

**hey guys! im back with another chapter! by the way i might not be able to update for a week or so but i will try to get the next chapter up ASAP! i just have a play coming up soon and i have a lot of rehersals to do but i promise it will be up ASAP! by the way this is my longest chapter yet hope you enjoy! :D**

**disclaimer: i do not own the hunger games**

i look at him and sigh.  
"haymitch what am i gonna do" i ask softly and i hear him sigh.

"sweetheart...you know what you have to do tell them that you have to leave and-" i cut him off.

"NO!" i snap "im not telling them not yet they will think i want to leave them to that i wont come back like peeta did!" i look down almost immediatly and i hear the scraping of a chair dragging against the floor and suddenly haymitch is beside me breathing down my neck.

"ok katniss" i flinch when he calls me katniss because it means hes either annoyed or very angry with me but right now i dont care "i get it your sad and nothing has been going right since peeta died but u seriously gotta stop this all about me attuitde because its not all about you a lot of people are hurting because peeta is dead! what about me? huh?! peeta was like my son but u dont see me moping around all day! katniss you gotta think what about your kids!? they are hurting too! so sweetheart i would tell them tomorrow or im gonna tell them tomorrow ok!?" he almost yells at me and i nod slowly tears filling my eyes.

those words hurt they were like a slap in the face but we both know i needed it "good!" i hear him say sternly and i listen as he leaves the house and once i hear the door slam i lean my head on the table and burst into tears. after a few minutes of crying i wipe away my tears and walk upstairs to my room. i lay in my bed thinking on how im gonna tell my kids i have to leave in a week.

ONE WEEK LATER...

im at the train station hugging my childern and saying good bye to them promising them i would be back soon. i choose the train because i felt safer and the memories of peeta i cant hide from them forever. i hear a train whistle in the distance and look towards it and sigh trying not to cry im leaving my kids for the first time and i can tell they are scared that i wont come home like their dad. at least i know if i dont come home they have haymitch to take care of them i know they will be safe. i hold them tightly and sigh whispering in there ears.

"i love you guys and im gonna be home in a few days alright?" i look at them and they nod slowly.

"but mommy what if-" lily starts and i shake my head.

"its not gonna happen lily ok? im coming home if its the last thing i do" i interupt and they nod.

"we love you mommy" they say in unison hugging me tightly i hug them back.

"i love you too bye..." i say letting them go and they wave at me i stand up and kiss them both "im gonna miss you guys" i tell them and i can see they are both holding back tears they dont want me to leave.

"bye mommy we will miss you too" they say and i walk away to haymitch and he pulls me into a hug.

"take care of them haymitch" i whisper in his ear and he nods.

"you know i will sweetheart you just try to have fun alright?" i nod and he kisses my head "good bye sweetheart see you soon" i smile a little.

"bye haymitch see you soon and the kids" i say and kiss his cheek and hear the train pull up behind me and i start shaking and haymitch just holds me at arms length.

"its ok sweetheart its gonna be ok" he says and i nod and turn towards the train and pick up my bags and wave to everyone.

"bye i will be back soon" i say waving and i step on the train. i set my bag down in the living area and almost faint at what i see.

i walk into the train that toke me to my first games i walk into the same car where i had my first conversation with peeta where i fell in love with my passed husband. i sit down in the same chair i did 16 years ago and look over someone is sitting in the chair peeta sat in. my heart races and i am filled with hope.

Did my husband not die in the crash? Did he somehow find his way back to me? my eyes fill with tears and i jump on the figure sitting in the chair knocking it over.

"PEETA!" i shouted before realizing im alone and my mind had played a cruel trick on me. i sigh and stand up i refuse to let the tears fall down my face and onto the floor. so instead i walk to my room place my bag on the floor and climb into the shower after turning on the water i started crying letting my tears mix with the water.

i just wanted my husband back thats all i want so my kids are happy again im happy again everyone is happy again. i rest my hands on my flat stomach i want this baby right? i mean i want to be happy this is peetas last gift to me i want it i know i do i love him to much not to have it but, can i take care of 3 kids by myself.

i sure hope so because im gonna try! not only for me but for peeta and the baby. i get out of the shower and get into some pajamas and i walk to my bed curl up arms wrapped around my baby and i cry myself to sleep.

THE NEXT DAY

i get up early we are only about an hour away from district 6 so i get dressed in a simple green shirt and pants and go to eat breakfast. i hear someone walk up behind me.

"morning katniss" the voice says i reconize this voice but refuse to look at who it was it had the rich capitol accent on it.

"morning" i reply coldly not feeling like talking to anyone and behind me i hear the person laugh i turn around sharply "what is-cinna!" i yell "your alive!" i jump from my seat and hug him "i thought you died all those years ago" i feel his arms tighten around me.

"i know katniss and im sorry for doing that to you" he says quietly and i shake my head.

"no cinna it wasnt your fault but how did you get here how did you find me again?" i ask frantically and he smiles  
"why dont we sit katniss and i will tell you the story" he tells me and i cant stop smiling and sit down in a chair.  
"so what happened cinna?" i ask "tell me everything!" and i hear him chuckle.

"you werent this eager before what changed you? are you still with peeta? i can see that happening him bringing out the good in you" he smiles and then looked at me and saw the sad expression on my face "whats wrong?" he asked and i sigh and look at him.

"peeta died" i say my voice barely above a whisper he looks at me sad.

"oh katniss im so sorry i didnt know-" he starts and hold up my hand stopping his words.

"its alright cinna please dont go on about how sorry you are" i say tears in my eyes and he sees them and nods.

"alright katniss" he says calmly and we feel the train slow down entering district 6 i sigh and stand up.

"sorry cinna i have to go i have a meeting here it was nice talking to you though" i force a smile he nods.

"yes you to katniss" he says and i walk out to grab my things and leave the train.

i walk to the hotel and check into my room and get settled i check the time, 9:40, i sigh and leave my room and take the elevator down to the main floor and when i get up i bump into a man walking in front of the elevator. i look up.

"sorry" i say "i wasnt watching where i was going" i smile fainly and the man looks at me and suddenly im staring into the blue eyes of my husband. "peeta" i whisper and hug him tightly "oh my god peeta! your alive! i thought you died the kids think your dead!" i say tears of joy falling from my face and i feel peeta tense up and push me away. he looks at me his eyes confused and hollow and the next 3 words he says to me will haunt me the rest of my life. he stares staight at me and asks quietly.

"who are you?"

**ok! im sorry i know this is a cruel and sad place to end this but it just worked! just remember i love you all you guys r the best people ever! i love yu guys for sticking with my story! :D so til next chapter! mes adieux amis!**


	6. Chapter 5

**hey guys! i just spent my whole afternoon writing this i hope you enjoy it! and i would like to specially thank Forfun100 for helping me with my fan fic and XxXRose-DimitriForeverXxX for reviewing the past 2 chapters! and being really into this fanfic! i posted this chapter for you stayed up really late writing it for you! so enjoy it!**

i look up at him and feel my heart breaking.

"peeta...its me katniss your wife" i say tears filling my eyes and he takes a step away from me and shakes his head.  
"no i dont have a wife and my names not peeta its austin im not even married you must have me confused with someone else" he says looking at me and i shake my head "well i will talk to you later katniss" he waves and turns to walk away.

"no!" i say and grab his hand and pull him back "ask me anything about you i can answer anything about you because your my husband please dont leave me again you know how hard these past weeks have been without you the kids our five year old daughter lily and our two year old son jayden remember them? they love you and miss you i love you and miss you please peeta believe me!" i say tears falling down my cheeks and he hugs me tightly.

"im sorry im not who you think i am but i will be here to help you but im not this peeta you claim me to be im sorry" he looks at me and wipes away my tears. i look up at him and sighs 'ive lost my husband...' i think. he smiles at me and i force a pretty believable smile back.

"so this meeting for all bakery managers where is it" i ask trying to change the subject he looks at me and point to the other side of the lobby.

"third door on your right kat" he says and i nod and quickly walk away trying hard to hide the tears that are filling my eyes 'haymitch and peeta are the only ones who ever called me that' i think.

_**(peeta's point of veiw)**_

i watch her walk away quickly and turn into the room i told her to and sigh 'shes nice but im not married my name isnt even peeta!'. i look back over to where she is and i wonder most of my past is a mystery to me if this girl knows me maybe, just maybe, i can figure out who i am.

_**(katniss's point of veiw)**_

_****_i sigh and look around the room im the only girl here 'great...' i say in my mind. 'could this day get any worse! my husband doesnt even know me! i am in a room full of guys im never gonna hear the end of these males flirting with me! and im pregnant!' im staring at the ground and im being shaken from my thoughts.

"hey katniss! are you ok? whats wrong you just spaced out there" peeta says and i look around everyone is staring at me and i immediately want to curl up and hide for the rest of the weekend.

"im fine!" i snap and everyone is still staring at me and that sets me off "im fine! stop staring at me!" i basically yell and everyone immediately looks away. someone who im guessing is the board director clears his throat and starts the meeting.

"welcome lady" he says and motions to me and all the guys i dont even look at me. peeta hasnt even looked at me since i exploded at everyone i dont blame him though. "and gentleman" the director finishes with a smile and i roll my eyes. how could somebody be so happy when this day couldnt possibly get any worse. but, sadly i was mistaken the meeting lasted several hours and we didnt get to go to our rooms til late at night. i didnt even check the time i just had a shower, got changed and crawled into bed. i was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

**_(peeta's pov)_**

**__**i follow katniss out of the meeting and before i get a chance to talk to her she rushes off to her room. i sigh i hope shes ok i never got a answer from her eariler and i wanted to know why she snapped at everyone. we were only worried about her.

i slowly walk back to my room stopping to talk to some of the other baker managers. they are impressed with me i have only worked for a short time in the bakery here in district 6 and im already the manager. so after im done talking to everyone i wave good night and walk to my house and have a shower.

i crawl under my soft blankets and fall asleep. the next morning i wake up really early and i run to the hotel. i wanted to talk to katniss before the meeting today shes leaving in a day or two and i dont know when im gonna see her again. if i will ever see her again. when i get there i walk to her room and i knock on the door i hear shuffling and the latch coming undone before the doors opened i hear her yell.

"whos there!?" she askes and i smile.

"austin" i reply and before i know it the door is opening and shes standing there in a bathrobe.

"austin! what are you doing here so early?" she askes i can tell shes happy to see me but also suprised.

" i just came to see how you were doing you left in a rush yesterday and you just seemed agaited. are you ok?" i ask and she sighs.  
"why dont you come in and i will tell you i dont want anyone knowing yet so i swear to god you tell anyone!-" she starts and i hold up my hand trying not to laugh.

"katniss i wont tell i promise" i tell her and walk into her room and sit on one of the beds she sits on the other and looks at me pulls out her suitcase. she pulls something out of it and hands it to me.

"thats my husband" she says pointing to the man in the picture that seriously could be me "and my kids, lily" she says pointing to a little girl "and jayden" she points to a small boy "thats why i jumped on you yesterday...im sorry i really thought you were my husband as you can see you could be him" i nod.

"is this what you wanted to tell me?" i ask and she shakes her head and takes the picture back.

"no i just wanted to show you that so you knew why but im not myself right now...im pregnant right now and austin i still think you are my husband peeta so this would be your baby" she says and my jaw drops.

**so this chapter i tried writing in peetas point of veiw tell me how i did? love you guys! mes adieux amis!**


	7. Chapter 6

_disclaimer: i do not own the hunger games_

**_(Katniss' POV)_**  
i was looking at him waiting for his reaction but he just sat there and looked at me like i was crazy.

"peeta?" i whisper and that seems to snap him back to reality.

"katniss! im not peeta! im not your husband!" he screams at me. i jump away from him scared.  
"pee-" i start.

"i am not peeta katniss! ive told you im not! im sorry your in pain because you husband died but you cant find someone random on the street that looks like him and immediately think hes your husband" he says calming down a bit. i look at him and whisper.

"your birthday is august 15" he looks at me astonished.

"how-how did you know that?" he askes and i look down.

"thats peetas birthday" i say quietly and he just stares at me in disbelief.

"but im not peeta katniss!" he almost yells. i look at him with my soft grey eyes i know he loves.

"how do you know that? you have the same birthday as my husband you look exactly like my husband how can you not be him!?" i ask standing up he just stands up and walks to the door.

"just get ready for the conferance its in an hour" he says and walks out quickly and with venom in his voice. 'hes pushing me away...' i think.

_**(Peeta's POV)**_

i walk angrily back to my house 'who does she think she is! coming here and demanding that im her husband!' i walk inside and take a quick shower get changed and walk back to the hotel. i am hoping this weekend is over soon i dont want to be around katniss anymore! i walk into the conferance room and of course i lost track of time and im the last one there. 'great' i think the only available seat is next to katniss. i sigh and sit there and the conferance begins about 4 or so hours later we get let out for a bit to get something to eat. before i can move an inch katniss has grabbed my arm.

"please all i want to do is talk" she says in a voice that i cant say no to but if i werent mistaken it sounded like she was gonna cry. so i nod and follow her out. she leads me around back and once we get there i can tell shes crying. i quickly go and hug her.

"katniss whats wrong?" i ask quickly.

"im sorry" is all she says back and i look at her confused.

"what are you apoligizing for? if anything i should be apologizing" she looks up at me with tears still in her eyes and i wipe them away. "im sorry for yelling at you and getting mad its just hard because you are a very stubborn and persistant person and you probably push prople over the edge more then you should." i see a hint of a smile form on her lips and she looks me straight in the eyes.

"thank you" she says quietly "but im sorry i was pushing you into making you think your my husband it was wrong of me to do that and im sorry" she says and smiles "oh by the way you just described me perfectly thats how almost everyone i know describes me" i hear her laugh a little and its amazing.

"i love your laugh" i whisper in her ear.

_**(Katniss' POV)**_

_****_when i heard him whisper those words in my ear i couldnt stop smiling and before i know it i crash my lips hungrily against his pressing my lips against his soft ones that i have grown to love since the day we were reaped. i pull away blushing staring straight into his bright blue eyes.

"im sor-" i start and before i can finish peeta has his lips against mine hungrily i wrap my arms around his neck pulling him closer. he has his arms around my waist he pulls me close and right when i think everything has turned for the better her pulls away quickly.

"whats wrong?" i ask.

"i cant do this im sorry katniss" he says avoiding looking at me.

"why" i ask confused everything was better now right?! or so i thought. he looks straight at me.

"katniss im sorry i cant do this...im in love with someone else"

**_hey guys soooooo sorry it took me so long to get this chapter up and its really short but i just wanted to get one up! but review and follow if you like it! i promise i will also have the next chapter up soon! mes adieux amis!_**


	8. Chapter 7

_**(Katniss' POV)**_

my heart dropped did he just say those words he didnt love me and even worse he loved another girl.

"what..." i look at him hoping to god hes lying but the look on his face says all to well hes telling the truth.  
"im in love with someone else katniss im sorry...i should never of let it get this far" he says stepping back from me and avoiding my gaze. i shake my head and look at him.

"no austin i never should have let it go anywhere im sorry" i tell him and walk away trying to hide the fact im crying. i have lost him my husband, the father of my kids, and the only man i could ever actually love.

now he is gone from my life possibly forever. i walk away quickly im crying hard how could i not cry my husband does even remember me he doesnt know his name and when i try to tell him who he really is he gets mad at me and to top it off he tells me hes doesnt even love me but another girl!

_**(Peetas POV)**_

i feel bad for her she just wanted someone to love and to love her now she found that person. im that person she loves but i just broke her heart i told her i loved someone else how can she even still like me after that. i sigh and look down i just destroyed a relationship with an amazing girl whos kind funny and smart.

"hey austin! what did you do to katniss to make her cry so bad?" a voice said from behind me.

"rick leave me alone!" i practically yelled at him turning around to face him. Rick works at the bakery with me hes helping me out since im the new manager mostly with all the paperwork. hes the one who found me wandering the district and he helped me get a new life i think i ran from somewhere but im not sure rick said i am from 5 hes seen me there a lot of times.

i hit my head on something and i got slight amnesia the doctor said i remember parts of my past but most of them i dont i remember i had a friend i forget his name but he looked like rick so i guess thats who it is and i remember im a baker. he said we have been best friends since we were little and hes filled me in on my whole life, so know i know most of my memories. its all thanks to rick.

"woah calm down! it was just a question austin but you obviously did something to her she ran out of the hotel crying who knows where shes going" he said and shrugs "but you dont care" he turns to leave but smirks and faces me "before i leave tell me how you did it?" he asks

"did what" i ask confused.

"how were you able to get katniss to love you that quick" he says "since her husband died and she took his place as bakery manager for district 12 all of us guys have been trying to hook up with her and here you come along and shes fallen in love with you at first sight! you must have done something to her! i know you look like peeta but he died everyone knows that" he says i look at him.

"you dont get it shes was married shes hurting oh look i come along i could be her husbands twin she thinks i am her husband! rick and i told her i was in love with someone else!" i say and he laughs.

"who?!" he asks not believing me.

"i dont know i just wanted her to leave me alone" i say softly "now i regret it i hurt her a lot" i look down sad. he shrugs and looks at me.

"what can you do austin? but come on we have to get back to the meeting" he tells me and i start heading back with him.

"alright but its gonna be horrible being in the same room with her after what i told her" i sigh "i hurt her bad if she ran off crying" i look down "but whats done is done right?" i say and he nods.

"yep definatly austin" he says and we walk into the room katniss is aready there so is everybody else i take the seat farthest from katniss and rick takes the seat next to her. he wraps his arm around her looking like hes trying to comfort her she pushes him away until he whispers something to her and she stops and lets him hold her.

i clench my fists how dare he do that to her! but why do i care i jut broke her heart. i am not allowed to care after what i did to her so i ignore them and listen to the rest of the meeting.

_**(Rick's POV)**_

finally! katniss is letting me touch her maybe i can be her next husband i know austin is really peeta but i have had a crush on katniss since i saw her on TV for the 74th hunger games. i knew back then i wouldnt be able to marry her or anything but that was then this is now and now shes trusting me to comfort her after what austin said. after what i changed peeta into so i could marry katniss i had it all planned out kill off peeta i rigged the hovercraft to crash to kill him when that didnt happen i found out he had amnesia.

i decided to change his entire life believe he was a different person. knowing peeta he would give the bakery over to katniss and then katniss would have to goto these stupid bakery meetings. then i would be able to make my move on her! get her to fall in love with me!

then marry her and by the time peeta regained his memory i have already married katniss and shes already fallen in love with me. he would have lost his wife and i would have gotten the best girl in the world. but if she keeps thinking he is peeta i might have to destroy him once and for all!

_**hey guys! sorry it took me forever but i wanted it to be really long! so i tried to make it one of my longest chapters! comments on how you like this rick guy! do you think hes gonna capture katniss' heart or will peeta regain his memory before that. also check back next update to find out what he said to katniss that changed her mind about letting him touch her. i love you all! thank you too all you guys for staying with me! mes adieux amis!**_


	9. Chapter 8

_**(Katniss's POV)**_

he whispered words in my ear i never thought i would hear from him, words of care and compassion? when has rick ever been kind or even nice to me! hes always been flirty and wanting me to go out with him and now hes acting nice? has he really changed?

"dont worry katniss peeta was my best friend i miss him too" rick whispers in my ear and i froze, what was he trying to do here? hes being kind to me since when is rick kind! but im in need of someone to just help me and comfort me. what austin said was horrible and crushed me maybe i was wrong maybe hes not peeta just some guy who looks like him.

but what if it isnt i mean peeta's body was never found it crashed near distrist 6 it could be him but how do i prove it him. i look over at austin or peeta whoever he is and i reconize it before anyone else. the clouding of his eyes him clenching his fists my husband was having one of his attacks.

"everyone out" i scream standing up they look at me like im crazy and i just glare at them. "get! out! i told you!" i scream again and they all rush out well all except peeta and rick. i turn to rick and glare at him. "get the fuck out rick!" i yell and turn to peeta hes stood up now and has his glare aimed at me i walk slowly over to him. "peeta..." i coo "stop remember not real peeta this is not real none of this is real come on peeta" i repeat stepping closer and closer to him i finally get within arms reach of him.

i go to grab his hand and thats when i feel his hands on my throat squeezing tighter and tighter choaking me squeezing the life from me. before i black out i see something above peetas head and then i go limp.

i wake up a few hours later im in a hospital room and the one person i dont expect to see is here.  
"rick?" i say quietly "what happened? wheres peeta?" i ask quickly my husband is alive and hes not here i want to know where he went. rick sighs beside me.

"katniss its ok just calm down austin chocked you and now your in the hospital and if you mean austin hes in a different room getting some work done on him" he says and i shake my head.

"no! stop let him go! i love him the way he is and its not austin its peeta there is only one person in this whole world who has attacks like that. its my husband peeta mellark!" i say and sit up getting out of bed "now tell me where my husband is before i punch your face in!" i threaten and he bites his lip.

"just down the hall three doors down on you left" he says and points out the door.

"thank you" i say and walk down the hall into his room "peeta?" i say softly peeking my head in "are you in here?" i ask sweetly the way i usually talk after he has an episode like this. he looks up at me.

"katniss?" he says quietly "what are you doing here i almost killed u!" he said and all i can do is smile.

"im here because there is only one person in this whole world that do what you just did" i said "thats my husband" i smile at him and looks at me like im crazy.

"huh?! katniss i almost killed you! only a complete idiot would do that!" he says and i smile.

"then im the biggest idiot of them all!" i say and walk over to his bed. "there is only one person in the world who has those attacks and thats my husband." I smile sitting beside him. "your peeta and of that I'm sure" he just looks confused.

"those aren't attacks katniss rick said they were-" he starts and something clicked in my brain 'rick? rick! this is all his fault!

"rick! he told you this!" I almost scream interrupting him I storm out of the room and back into mine rick is still there and I slam him into the wall.

"what did you tell him! what did you do to him!" I yell at his face and he just looks at me shocked and scared.

"what I didn't do anything what are you talking about?" he asks frantically trying to get away from me I just push him harder against the wall.

"you know what rick! what did you tell peeta to forget me!" I scream in his face. how could someone be so heartless he had a family who loved him and he loved back. he just laughs and looks at me.

"I didn't tell him anything to forget you that crash is what did it I just changed his past he thinks I'm his best friend he thinks he's lived here his whole life katniss he doesn't love you anymore that wasn't my fault when I found him he didn't love you so really I just gave him a new life so now you can be with me" he says and before I know it his lips are on mine and he's kissing me I push him hard in the chest and step away from him my fists clenched tightly at my sides.

"get the fuck away from me you bastard!" I scream tears in my eyes how could he tell me that and think I could ever love him he took my husband away from me! I walk out of the room and out of the hospital I don't care if I wasn't supposed to leave my room I need to think and I go to the only place I can, the forest. I climb under the fence and climb up a tree close to the fence and burst into tears.

I lost him possibly forever and I cant do anything to get him back I have to leave tomorrow my kids need me. I sigh I have to stay peeta needs me more and I need him. I need him back I pull out my cell phone I am required to have and call my house thankfully after a few rings haymitch is the one to answer.

"hello" says a sleepy voice I forgot 6 is in a different time zone then 12.

"haymitch! I need to talk to you I'm not coming home tomorrow I might not be for a while" I tell him and he's suddenly awake.

"what do you mean by that! katniss you have to come home!" he says I sigh.

"haymitch I found peeta don't tell the kids but he doesn't remember any of us he doesn't even know who I am and I know its him because he had an attack and he went after me haymitch its him I have to stay I have to get him to remember" I say quietly.

"alright sweetheart but what am I going to tell the kids?" he asks I bite my lip.

"I don't know haymitch I will be home in a week at the longest ok? no matter what happens I promise" I say I hear him and he sighs.

"ok sweetheart see you in a week" he says I nod.

"see you in a week bye haymitch" I say.

"bye sweetheart" he says and we hang up.

"what am I going to do" I ask myself.

"why not ask me" says a voice and before I even turn to look at who it was I already know. its rick.

_**hey guy sorry about making you wait so long for the update its been busy haven't been able to get to my computer and for those of you asking 'mes adieux amis' means farewell friends in French. I hope you like this chapter I di it all in katniss' pov. well till my next update mes adieux amis!**_


	10. Authors announcement

_**Hey guys it's me I'm really sorry I haven't been updating I know most of you think this is a new chapter it's not its an apology I have had some serious writers block and I'm writing the next chapter but it's barely 500 words if you guys have any suggestions PM me or review either way I would be grateful!**_


	11. Chapter 9

_**HEY GUYS! im soooooooooo sorry it took me so long to put this up! but I was gone on vacation and I was just plain busy and lazy! sorry again guys I would also like to warn you this chapter has some swearing in it! SO DONT SAY YOU WEREN'T WARNED! also the sad part is only a few more chapters left possibly an epilogue too! but thanks guys for staying with me! also review! review! review!**_

_**(Katniss' POV)**_

I turn around to look at him glaring at him.

"what the fuck do you want! haven't you destroyed my life enough already!" I snap angrily and he takes a few steps back.

"I just wanted to smooth things over with us maybe forget what happened and what I did" he says quietly and I jump down from the tree glaring at him.

"you think I will ever! fucking forgive you! do you realize what you did! you took my husband away from me! don't you get it! I may never get him back! because of your selfishness! just get out of my face you son of a bitch!" I scream in his face and he quickly ran away from me and I broke down crying. The thought I may never get peeta back was to much for me I found him this is what I wished for was to have him back right? wrong!

I wanted my husband not some person in my husbands body. but the only thing I can do is bring him back make him remember and if he doesn't remember by the end of the week when I have to go I promised haymitch I would come back then maybe, just maybe he wont come back its been over a month since the crash he's seen me and he doesn't remember a thing he's seen pictures of our family I've told him about them. he still doesn't remember them.

_**(Rick's POV)**_

I run away from her she was angry I don't blame her I guess I was lost in my love for her, I didn't seen how much she loves him. I tried to apologize but she's mad and upset. how can I show her I do care for her?

I guess I could try to get peeta back to himself but he thinks he's lived her for so long. he thinks all my lies are the truth and the truth is the lies. I got to try maybe then katniss will think of me as someone else someone more then just a co-worker, maybe even as a friend.

yah I like that me, her and peeta just friends. her and peeta married having their kids together and me being the leftover person on the side watching the girl I love be with someone else. I might find someone else but maybe not probably not.

_**(Peeta's POV)**_

I am walking through the woods the doctors let me go outside for a bit which I am grateful for. the hospital is so boring and I think the forest it helps me relax. I am walking and I hear sobbing coming from behind a tree.

"hello? who's there?" I ask trying not to scare the person who's crying. I slowly walk towards the sound of the crying "hello?" I say again. I walk into a clearing and there's katniss crying under a tree.

"katniss! what's wrong! why are you crying?!" I ask sitting beside her. I out my arm around her and pull her close I know I'm not supposed to be doing this but what kind of guy finds a crying girl and doesn't do anything to help her.

"everything is wrong peeta...your my husband but rick changed your memories so he could marry me he loves me but I love you and now I might never get you back because of him!" she starts crying into my shoulder and I hold her close.

"wait! rick did this! but he was my friend...I trusted him! believed every word he told me! when I should have been listening to you! but why did he do that?...there has to be a reason..." I say looking at her. she pulls away to wipe her eyes then sighs.

"he told me it was because he wanted me to marry him so he was trying to get rid of you so I would marry him" she sighs and looks down "but you still don't remember anything do you?" she asks. I'm shocked from what I just heard rick wanted me out of the way just to get a girl!

"that's sick!" is all I manage to get out and I stand up and marching away without answering her question.

**_(Rick's POV)_**

I made my way back to the bakery I just started making bread and some cinnamon dough when Austin walks in.

"hey Austin!" I wave at him "want to help with the baki-" before I finish my sentence there is a fist in my face knocking me to the ground. I hold my jaw he's got one powerful punch it feels broken!

"what the hell was that for!" I yell. his fists are clenched and he's pissed at me for something.

"you know what rick!" he yells back. "you lied to me! about every thing! my name isn't even Austin! what the hell were you thinking!" he is almost screaming in my face now.

"ok ok! I'm sorry! peeta please I'm sorry!" I plead looking at him. "I made a big mistake please I'm sorry" and before I know it I'm on the ground again I'm starting to see stars and my vision is blurring. "peeta stop please" I'm begging now.

"no! that was my family! thanks to you! I forget them! ran from my wife! told her I was in love with someone else! because I thought she was some crazy depressed widow! she knew the truth all along! and so did you! I'm not going to stop! until I get back every second of my life you took from me! made me believe I was someone I'm not! rick you took more then u think from me!" he's screaming at me and wont stop.

I've backed myself into a corner covering my head with my arms trying to stop the punches flying at me. I wait and I wait but the punches never come I move my arms and there is peeta on the floor katniss sitting beside him what looks like to me she's trying to calm him down.

"katni-" I began and she cuts me off.

"rick just don't...your lucky he didn't go into one of his attacks then he would have killed you so either shut up or get the hell outta here!" she yells. I quickly stand up and run out. I realize, katniss just saved my life.

_**(Peeta's POV) **_

who did he think he was! Doing what he did! I'm going to kill him! He's going to die! I'm thinking as I march to the bakery. I enter it and there's rick standing there happy making dough for god knows what! his words! him calling me Austin I punched him as hard as I could and I scream at him. he begs for me to stop but I don't at least not till katniss comes and grabs my hands forcing me to look into those stormy grey eyes. I calm down almost immediately she yells something at rick in which I don't catch. she makes me sit on the floor with her and she calms me down enough I start listening to her.

"who are you" I hear her ask softly.

"I'm peeta mellark" I respond. "at least that's what I have been told by someone who fought to get me back so I'm pretty that's who I am" I smile at her. she smiles back I can tell she's happy I mean who wouldn't be happy right?! I'm happy!

"hey katniss" I say softly in her ear. "what about those kids you never stop talking about I would like to meet them again I'm guessing they missed you just as much as they missed me" I say looking at her. She stands up quickly.

"oh my gosh! peeta! your right! come on! the kids think your dead! haymitch still thinks your dead! he thinks I didn't actually find you again! come on!" she's almost pulling me away. I'm trying not to laugh.

"are you always like this?" I ask. she looks at me confused.

"always like what?" she asks back. I can help but laugh again.

"always this excited and happy" I tell her and she shakes her head.

"not usually but I'm really happy you want to know why?" she asks me smiling.

"because your husband came back from the dead" I say wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her close. she smiles again. I can never get tired of that smile.

"that and cause love always finds a way" she says and kisses me gently.

**_hey guys! how do you like the title coming into the story and katniss and peeta finally being together! I'm sorry this chapter was really rushed! I love you all! especially for staying with me for that really long period where I didn't update! see you soon! mes adieux amis!_**


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